The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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