everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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