Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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