We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
