too bad you live with your parents still
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
no you cant smoke seaweed
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
