Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(213): View more from California

I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Yeah, where have you been?

(407): View more from Florida

Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.

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(713): View more from Texas

I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer

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(613): View more from Ontario

I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Is there a law against that?

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.

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(425): View more from Washington

You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐

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(719): View more from Colorado

My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.

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