I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
