the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
there was a trapeze. enough said
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
