Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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