Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
