seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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