well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
the liver wants what the liver wants
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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