so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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