Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
