That's intense
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
