"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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