So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
