So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
