everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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