Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize