Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
