i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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