just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
