Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
