i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
