So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
