As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
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