I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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