I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
foreskin is a definite game changer
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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