i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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