Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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