Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
