It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
FUCK WHALES
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
