He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
a search helicopter?!
Semen is not good for contacts.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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