Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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