So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
