Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
