Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I need a beard to bite.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
