I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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