She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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