just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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