How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
