Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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