Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
