redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
