I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Life is so much better after having sex.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
