I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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