he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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