You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
