i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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